Gentlemen, charge your glasses

The Warner has the latest revelation on our Grand Old Duke: "Apparently some Downing Street pondlife were attempting to hijack the funeral of Diana, Princess of Wales and, in particular, to dictate the roles of Princes William and Harry, in their customary exploitative way. Down the speakerphone from Balmoral thundered a classic Philippic: "**** off."" There is a time and place to convey our more rudimentary instincts, even for a prince, a duke and a royal consort. This was one of them.